Journey
by NettieC
Summary: It's been a long journey for Mac to get from where she once was to where she wants to be. Harm is determined to help her on this journey but will he screw it up before he gets the chance to give her what she wants most?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Not mine

Journey 1/3

It didn't matter, really it didn't, or at least that's what Mac was trying to convince herself. After years of dancing around the topic of 'us' with Harm, they were finally together, had been for two months and it had been one of the happiest times of her life. Still, here she was, staring out her office window, trying to convince herself that it didn't matter that Harm had just driven out of the car park with a well built, tall, leggy blonde when he was supposed to be having lunch with her. She tried telling herself that there was a reasonable excuse as to why he'd forgotten their plans, a suitable explanation as to why that woman had kissed him on the cheek and hugged him tightly.

Shaking her head, she turned back to her desk and sat looking at the piles of files on the corner and the three open windows on her computer. There was so much work for her to do she didn't really have time to think about her errant boyfriend. Ignoring her stomach's reminder that she was supposed to be at lunch by now, Mac turned her attention to the Taylor file and finished the paperwork which had been long overdue.

Locking herself in her office, Mac saw nothing except the reams of paperwork and after a very productive three hours there was only the current case file on her desk. Deciding to give herself an early mark as reward for her effort, and to avoid a certain naval commander, should he come back, Mac presented herself to the General and requested his permission to secure early for the weekend, something he agreed to.  
>"Everything alright, Mac?" General Cresswell asked as she neared the door.<br>"Yes, sir," she said turning to face him.  
>"Are you sure?" he questioned, he'd been in the job three years and she had never requested permission to secure early.<br>"Yes, sir," she repeated.  
>"Very well then," he said with a nod. "Have a good weekend."<br>"Thank you, sir, you too."

Home before 1600 hours, something which hadn't happened in a long time, Mac shed her uniform before dressing in jeans and a sweater. Grabbing a small bag, Mac threw in some clothes for the next few days, a couple of books, her camera , an extra pair of shoes and her toiletries before picking up her jacket and heading back down to her car. There was no way she was going to sit around and wait for any man to remember where he was supposed to be.

Heading out of town, Mac realised she didn't have a destination in mind but that didn't dissuade her, she was great at making plans on the run, she'd know the place to stop when she saw it. Driving north west she ended up on the I-70 W and kept driving, ignoring her hunger and the constant ringing of her cell. After three hours though, enough was enough and she took the turnoff for Altoona, PA.

The local billboards mentioned its tourist attractions and while caverns and railway museums weren't exactly her thing, she figured a nice hotel room, her books and room service would make an ideal weekend.

Pulling her car up at the Marriott Hotel, Mac went in and, after booking in and getting her swipe cards for the garage and her room door, moved her car and headed up to Room 429. Smiling to herself, Mac deposited her bag on the chair and took in the views in the fading twilight, it would do.

Picking up the compendium, Mac flicked through and to her disappointment found they didn't do room service.  
>"Oh well," she said to herself, "Guess I'll go to the restaurant."<p>

Grabbing her purse and book, she headed back downstairs and soon found herself seated at a table for two near the fish tank. Perusing the menu, she found she was hungrier than she thought and ordered a porterhouse steak, with fries and salad and a coke. Reading her book as she waited for the order, Mac heard the pings of her cell telling her there was yet another message and reluctantly she took the phone from her purse.

18 missed calls

16 messages

Each one was from Harm.

Reading through them, they all in essence said the same thing – 'Where are you? Are you okay? Call me. Please.'

Deciding she wasn't up for any conversation, Mac sent a text in reply.  
>'Gone away for w'end. See you Monday.'<p>

Not at all impressed by that information, Harm called once more only to have the call go through to voicemail.  
>'Mac, what's going on? I need you to call me. I need to talk to you.'<br>Mac just shrugged, that wasn't going to happen and she placed the phone back in her purse. When Harm continued to call she switched it off altogether and returned to her book, only stopping when dinner was served and Mac had to declare it was the best steak she'd had in a long time.

After being told that they did do desserts to take away, Mac ordered the chocolate mud cake with double whipped cream and headed back to her room after stopping by the vending machine to buy a few drinks. Settled back in her room, she drew a soothing bubble bath and relaxed in there for about 30 minutes before towelling off and slipping into her nightgown.

Sitting on the bed with the television on for company, Mac commenced her mission to eat her rather large portion of cake, something she achieved with ease. Feeling rather happy, and contented, except for the issues with Harm, Mac decided she should have an early night. Realising she should do the responsible thing, Mac pulled out her cell and turned it on, it was no surprise to her that there were a whole lot of new messages and all from Harm.

Deciding to be adult about things, she called Harm's cell and he picked up immediately, the caller ID telling him exactly who it was.  
>"Where the hell are you?" he asked, his extreme agitation at the situation plainly evident in those five words.<br>"I'm fine," she said curtly.  
>"That's not what I asked," he retorted. "Where are you? I want to come and talk to you."<br>"That won't be possible," she replied. "I'm not in town."  
>"I will drive, fly or swim to wherever you are, Mac," he said emphatically. "Now, where are you?"<br>"Harm," she said with a deep sigh. "This is not getting us anywhere."  
>"No, it's not," he agreed. "Okay," he continued, taking a deep breath. "I just want to understand what's going on."<br>"I felt like getting away for a few days and so I did," she said simply.  
>"Without telling me?" he challenged, not that she needed his permission but he would have liked to have been told.<br>"Oh, I was going to tell you," she said casually. "I thought we'd discuss it over lunch..."

And those two words hit him harder than any sledgehammer could – over lunch. The lunch he was supposed to have with her...the lunch he had completely forgotten about ... the lunch he'd taken with Shona Campbell with instead.  
>"Just what I thought, Harm," she said with a sigh. "Look, you obviously have more important things on your mind than me, so you have a good weekend and I'll see you Monday."<br>"Mac," he called out, afraid she'd disconnect the call. "About lunch..."  
>"What about it?" she asked, wondering what convoluted story he'd give.<br>"I'm sorry," he apologised. "I completely forgot about it."  
>"Great to know I mean so much," she replied, chewing her bottom lip.<br>"You mean the world to me, Mac, and don't pretend you don't know it," he replied, hurt that she'd be so casual about his feelings for her.  
>"I mean so much you forget about me and go to lunch with some leggy blonde," she said, not wanting to fight with him anymore, just wanting to forget about it.<br>"You don't understand," he protested, though he knew he hadn't given her any information to enable her to comprehend. "It was an important meeting."  
>"So important you were still out at 1530?" she questioned. "Must have been some lunch."<br>"Mac, it's nothing like that," he said defensively.  
>"Well, I left the office at 1530 and you hadn't returned from 'lunch', so what do you want me to think?" she asked sliding between the sheets of her king sized bed.<br>"I want you to think that I love you and would never intentionally hurt you," he said quietly.  
>"I know you love me and I love you, Harm," she said with a sigh. "But I'm getting a little tired of being second choice...today it was lunch with whomever she was, last week you threw me over for plans with Sturgis, three days ago you said you'd come over and stay the night and never showed."<br>"Mac..." he said although there was no way to defend his recent insensitive behaviour.  
>"Look, I think some time out is what we need," she said, closing her eyes to fight her tears. "You are obviously very busy and I'm in the way ..."<br>"No, you're not in the way," he protested, tears filling his eyes. "Don't ever think that. I have been an insensitive jerk and while there are reasons for it there is no excuse and I am so very sorry you've been hurt."  
>"Okay," she said, not wanting to prolong the agony of this conversation.<br>"Okay, what?" he asked. "Am I forgiven?"  
>"Yes, Harm, I forgive you," she said with a sigh.<br>"Okay," he said. "That's a start. Now, is there any way I can make things up to you?"

Mac thought about it for a moment; while it was true what she wanted was some time away from DC she wasn't all that sure she wanted to be alone.  
>"I'm at the Marriott in Altoona," she said. "If you want to take me out for lunch tomorrow."<br>"Altoona? As in Pennsylvania?" he questioned and when she confirmed it, he added, "That's only three hours away I could be there tonight."  
>"No, Harm, lunch tomorrow, that's what I'm offering," she said, and while she loved nothing more than sleeping with him and sharing breakfast, she was planning to make him wait until lunch.<br>"Can I push it and suggest brunch?" he asked, knowing he'd leave home at first light and be there in ample time.  
>"No, you can't," she said firmly. "I will see you in the lobby at noon and not a minute earlier...or later," she added to make her point.<br>"I will definitely be there," he said, very glad she'd given him a reprieve. Now, all he had to do was come up with a way to explain his recent behaviour and he had 15 hours to do it.

Once she'd disconnected the call, Mac rearranged the pillows before flicking through channels on the television and settling on watching Pretty Woman, she was asleep long before her favourite scene with the necklace. She slept soundly.

The same could not be said of Harm who tossed and turned for a good portion of the night, his bed feeling decidedly uncomfortable without Mac there, his heart feeling very heavy at the current turn of events in his relationship with Mac. He hadn't set out to hurt her, quite the opposite, he was on a mission to show her just how much she meant to him. Unfortunately, his methods didn't match his intentions and he had a lot to do to make it up to her.

Up, showered and dressed before the sun had appeared, Harm grabbed an overnight bag and a couple of bottles of water and set off for Altoona. Telling himself he'd stop somewhere for breakfast, Harm knew he'd most likely drive right through to Altoona and find something there – preferably somewhere very close to the Marriott to ensure he wouldn't be late.

That's what he did. Arriving in town just after nine, Harm pulled up in front of a cafe serving breakfast and bought a newspaper from the stand nearby before finding a table and sat so the hotel was in his vision every time he looked up. Not that he expected the hotel to disappear; he just didn't want to take the chance it would.

Breakfast for him was a cheese and tomato omelette with wholemeal toast and apple juice followed by a coffee and two refills to take him up to 1100, by which time he'd read the newspaper three times though he really hadn't comprehended most of it. Meanwhile, Mac enjoyed a full breakfast in the hotel restaurant, bacon, eggs, sausages and pancakes with orange juice and a coffee. After sleeping well and late, she had dressed and wandered down about 0930 and had helped herself from the buffet. Finished by 1015, she'd wandered back upstairs, showered and dressed for the day.

Her plan wasn't to sit in her room all morning but she knew Harm would be early and didn't want to see him until noon, eager to make her point. So she watched re-runs of I Love Lucy, filed her nails and thought of everything else but Harm ... not that it was too effective. Deciding she would drive herself to distraction waiting until noon, Mac made her way down to the lobby at 1130, planning on taking up a position in the corner and waiting for Harm, not wanting to seem over eager.

She didn't get the chance as he was sitting in an armchair looking straight at the elevator when the doors opened. Instantly he was on his feet.  
>"I know it's not noon yet," he said quickly without greeting. "So, if you're not ready to meet with me then I can sit here and wait...no pressure..."<br>"Hi, Harm," she said, stepping forward to stand in front of him.  
>"Hi, Mac," he said leaning in to kiss her cheek.<br>"Did you get much traffic?" she asked, finding it hard to make small talk with him.  
>"No, none at all," he said, although he didn't say it was because he left DC before anyone else was up.<br>"Good," she said, before nodding.

The silence grew and soon became uncomfortable.

"Um..." Mac continued. "Are you hungry? Did you want to get something to eat or drink?"  
>"I'm fine, Mac," he replied. "I've actually been camped out in that cafe..." He pointed across the road. "...For the best part of two hours."<br>"Oh, okay," she said, nodding again.  
>"But, if you are, we can..." he started but Mac shook her head.<br>"I've not long had breakfast," she said before taking a deep breath. "Okay...this is feeling all very strange..." she admitted. "I don't want to spend the day feeling awkward and second guessing everything we say to each other."  
>"Me neither," he agreed, not liking the feeling between them and knowing it was he who had caused it. "I have no excuses for treating you so poorly recently. I love you, I do and I know it might not seem like it but this is all still very new between us and I have to remind myself that this is real ... I still find it hard to believe I have you in my life as more than a work partner and friend ... For so long I have wanted this..." he gestured between the two of them ..."I guess I'm just no good at it."<br>"You're better than you think," she said, reaching out and taking his hand. "How about we head out to the Lincoln Caverns," she said, "And do some exploring and get a late lunch or early dinner and then talk this through."  
>"Sounds like a great idea," he said squeezing her hand.<p>

Choosing to take Harm's car as it was already parked on the street, the pair travelled in relative silence until Harm took the left turn for the US-22 E and realised it was going to be a long day if neither spoke. Knowing Mac had said they'd talk that night, he wanted move things along.  
>"May I say something?" he asked, taking a quick glance at her.<br>"Go ahead," she replied with a brief nod.  
>"Yesterday, I had lunch with Shona Campbell," he said, his eyes fixed on the road. "You've never met her before but four years ago I went out with her three times." He could feel Mac bristle beside him. "Yesterday morning, she called me out of the blue to say she was in DC for the day with her young daughter and really wanted to catch up as she had something serious to discuss with me."<p>

He paused to give Mac a chance to speak but nothing happened, so he drew a deep breath and continued.

"We, Shona and I, had had sex, back then and all I could think was she'd had my baby...It was the only thing I thought it could be and for the rest of the morning I could think of nothing else," he admitted, hoping she'd see he hadn't simply forgotten about her.

Still Mac said nothing.

"And so..." he continued realising he wasn't getting any feedback from Mac. "I told her to come straight to JAG and she did, called me from downstairs and I left for lunch. I'm sorry I didn't remember our plans ... but you have to understand that I wasn't thinking about much other than the serious discussion she wanted to have."

When Harm was taking too long to get to the point, Mac knew she'd have to say something or burst.

"So?" she prompted, desperately needing to know. "Is she? Is she yours?  
>"Her name is Alannah and she is the most gorgeous three and a bit year old, brown hair and blue eyes, so utterly adorable," he said with a smile. "But she's not mine," he added, taking a quick glance at Mac. "The father is the guy she slept with after me, another naval commander who was a one night stand... even she admitted she was a bit of a Navy groupie. She knew his name but nothing else and wanted to track him down, asked for my help."<br>"Oh, okay," Mac said, very relieved that Harm hadn't fathered a child to someone else. After all, he was finally hers after all these years and she'd be damned if she had to share him with someone else. Not that she'd let him know just how possessive she was about him ... that would boost his ego back to jet jock proportions  
>"Needless to say, I am very relieved myself," Harm continued. "The only children I want to father are yours," he continued, looking at her and catching her eye. "And it's been that way since we made the baby deal – it's why I made the baby deal."<br>"You do realise that AJ was 11 last month," Mac said looking at him.  
>"I know," he said with a nod. "I have wanted to parent children with you from way back then."<br>Mac nodded, not quite knowing what to say. Seriously, there'd been no one she had considered having children with but Harm. Despite all the angst and relationship breakdowns between them over the years, especially after Paraguay, she couldn't fathom the thought about a child of hers calling anyone else daddy.  
>"I guess I can understand yesterday's events," Mac finally said. She knew had he told her of the initial phone call then she would have been totally preoccupied too, she could only imagine what he had gone through.<br>"I never meant to hurt you," he said, taking the next turn off.  
>"I know," she replied, reaching over and resting her hand on his thigh.<br>"I do love you, Mac," he continued, hoping she'd truly believe him.  
>"I know," she repeated, rubbing his leg.<p>

For a while there was silence once more and Mac knew she should ask the nagging question ricocheting through her head rather than waiting for later that night.  
>"I understand about yesterday," she said by way of clarification but what about the other two things?" she said, her hand still resting on his leg. "Sturgis and the no-show."<p>

Harm made a noise which was half way between a deep breath and a sigh.  
>"I never had plans with Sturgis," Harm admitted and quickly grabbed Mac's hand before she retracted it. "It's your birthday next month and I was planning a surprise and used him as an alibi so I didn't have to explain it. I know you weren't impressed but the person who was helping me only had that time. And the other night..." he continued wanting to confess to everything, "Was also to do with your birthday...the time just flew and then I fell asleep at the computer and when I woke it was already midnight. I did text you though."<br>Mac nodded, he had done that, although by the time she received the message he was already in the bad books.  
>"I know it seems that I'm taking you for granted," he continued, "but I'm not ... I ... I am just having trouble with the communication side of things...yesterday was a different thing but the other two I was working on something to show you how much I love you and it backfired and I'm sorry."<br>"Pull over," she said, pointing to the side of the road.  
>"What?" he questioned, looking at the traffic around them.<br>"Pull over now!" she said firmly and the moment the car stopped Mac was out of the car, quickly followed by Harm.

Thinking the worst about her response, Harm threw his hands up as he rounded the front of the car to meet Mac who was coming his way. "I am sor..." Was all he managed before Mac's arms were around his neck and her lips were on his.  
>When she finally pulled back, she smiled at his glazed look.<br>"I do love you, Harm," she said kissing him briefly once more. "Just need you to consider how I might perceive things."  
>"I will. I will," he promised, wrapping his arms around her. "I will think things through and make sure you never doubt that you are very much the woman for me ... now and for always."<p>

Another kiss to seal their truce and back on the road to the caverns. While Mac wanted to know what the birthday surprise was, given the trouble it had caused, she knew she should wait until her actual birthday. After all, if it had preoccupied Harm to the extent he had forgotten about her, it must be something big.

However, not knowing was going to drive her crazy, so she opted for a compromise.  
>"Can you give me a hint?" she said out of the blue.<br>"Hint about what?" Harm said, taking the turnoff off the caverns.  
>"My birthday surprise," she said, turning to face him.<br>"It won't be a surprise if I tell you," he said with a grin.  
>"So don't tell me," she said. "Just give me a little hint."<br>"Okay, I will give you a hint," he said, thinking of how obscure a hint he could give. "It's something you've always wanted but never admitted to."  
>"If I've never admitted it, how do you know that I've wanted it?" she questioned.<br>"Nope, can't tell you that," he said smiling. "That would constitute a second hint and we only agreed on one."  
>"But..." she began to protest.<br>"Sorry, Mac, your birthday is in four weeks and ..." he began to explain.  
>"Actually, it's in 25 days," she corrected.<br>"Great," he replied. "Even less time to wait."

And so their weekend continued with fun and sightseeing in a much more convivial manner than either had expected, given the way it had started.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Not mine

Journey 2/3

25 days until her birthday may as well have been 25 months as far as Mac was concerned. As back in DC, the pace at JAG Headquarters picked up and between investigations and meetings, Harm and Mac had little time to themselves but time seemed to drag. Still, Mac had her birthday to look forward to and the big surprise.

Friday, three days before her Monday birthday, General Cresswell called Mac into his office just after lunch and told her to square her things away as he was getting information 'from above' that she would be required in the San Diego office to take command for up to a month due to a situation with the incumbent.  
>"When will I need to go, sir?" she asked, willing to go as it was her duty, disappointed she'd be across the country on her birthday.<br>"Tomorrow," he replied. "There will be briefings on Sunday and you'd be expected in the office by 0700 Monday."  
>"Aye, aye, sir," she replied, coming to attention.<br>"Now, at this stage," Cresswell continued. "This is all unofficial. The San Diego situation may be a storm in a tea cup and not eventuate but I thought you should be prepared."  
>"I appreciate the warning, sir," she replied, still at attention.<br>"Now, clear away whatever you need to and secure early," he replied. "My advice is to go home and pack the essentials, as soon as I know I will contact you."  
>"Aye, aye, sir," she said before turning on her heel and exiting the office.<p>

Disappointed at the news of her possible relocation, albeit temporary, Mac searched out Harm, alas to be disappointed again.  
>"He's out at Norfolk to speak to a witness, ma'am," Petty Officer Coates informed her. "Not sure of his ETA."<p>

Organising her files and handing the ones needing actioning to Coates to pass onto the General, should they need to be redistributed, Mac cleaned off her desk, closed down her computer and headed for home.

Unlocking her apartment door she was stunned to find fifteen big palm trees scattered around her living room. Her heating had to be on as the temperature was much higher in the apartment than outside and an industrial fan stood in the corner blowing the warm air around to give the place a balmy feel. Her sofa and arm chairs were now AWOL and in their place were two large beach lounges with a small table between them.  
>"Harm?" she called, knowing it could only be him that had done this.<br>"You called?" he answered, coming from the kitchen carrying two coconuts with straws and umbrellas in them and a non-alcoholic tropical drink within.

Mac didn't notice the drinks, not at all. Her attention was firmly on the fact Harm was wearing Hawaiian swimming trunks and nothing else.  
>"A drink?" he said, offering her the one in his right hand.<br>"What? What's going on?" she asked, not sure what to make of any of it.  
>"Well, I tried to convince Cresswell to give us a week's leave so we could go somewhere tropical and he said no, the best he could do was give us an early mark today and Monday off but we're both expected back at JAG Tuesday."<br>"No," she said with a shake of her head. "Looks like I'm headed to San Diego tomorrow – there's some snafu over there."  
>"No, you're not," he said, "That was just the story Cresswell gave you."<br>"But he said it came 'from above'," she replied, still not convinced this was all really happening.  
>"Yes, it did," he replied. "But not the from above you'd expect. I had the assistance of Mrs Cresswell."<br>"Dora Cresswell helped you with this?" she asked incredulously.  
>"Well, she helped with the leave and your birthday surprise but..." he began to explain.<br>"You mean this isn't my birthday surprise?" she questioned.  
>"It is a surprise for your birthday but it's not the one I was working on. That is your present which you will get Monday. This little tropical surprise is just in lieu of the real thing."<br>"So, we have a long weekend together, I'm not going west and I get to spend it here in paradise?" she asked needing to clarify things.  
>"You've got it exactly," he said with a grin; proud of his efforts and the disbelief on her face.<br>"Okay," she said with a nod before handing back her drink. "In that case, I'll be right back," she said before disappearing into her bedroom.

Fifteen minutes later, Mac reappeared in her blue bikini, a white and blue floral print sarong wrapped around her waist, her hair down, her makeup gone – after all, this was a beach vacation.  
>"Good god!" Harm muttered when he first saw her; she was breathtaking.<br>"Like?" she asked, swirling around.  
>"Oh, very much so," he replied as she took her drink back.<br>"Thank you," she said, taking her drink in one hand and wrapping the other around his neck. "This is all fantastic."

Pressing up, she kissed him softly. It didn't take long for the kiss to take on a life of its own and soon the pair were entwined on a lounge exchanging heated kisses.  
>"God dammit," Mac muttered when her cell rang.<br>"Leave it to me," Harm said before getting up and checking the phone. Caller ID said 'Anonymous' and that was enough for Harm to ignore it, turning the phone off completely.

He then proceeded turn his off and disconnect the landline. "No interruptions."  
>"Good thinking," she said with a grin, more than happy to have this weekend just about them.<p>

Feeling the heat of the situation, combined with the heat of the room, Mac fanned herself with her hand.  
>"You didn't manage to put the ocean in here somewhere?" she asked taking off her sarong and increasing Harm's temperature in the process.<br>"Well, not quite the ocean..." he said, taking her hand and leading her to the kitchen.  
>"Oh, my goodness," she said, taking in the sight.<p>

Her table was pushed back against the wall and dressed up as a tropical hut. The extra room on the floor was now their private beach. Actually, it was a sand colour tarpaulin with a sturdy inflatable pool filled with water with a couple of floating flowers drifting across the surface. Around the bench tops were candles ready to be lit.  
>"For our moonlight dip," he said when he saw her looking at the candles.<br>"I... It's ... I'm speechless," she said, her hands animated but her mouth not.  
>"Wait til you see the bedroom," he said with a laugh and instantly Mac was gone.<p>

The entire bedroom had been turned around with the bed head now resting against the wall opposite of the window which had the blind drawn and a sheet draped over it, on which was a hand painted island beach. Mac reached out to touch it.  
>"Don't," Harm warned, "It's still wet."<br>"You painted it?" she asked turning to face the man as he stood by the bed.  
>"Dora did this morning," he replied, very happy with the look of awe he had put on her face.<br>"Dora? As in Mrs Cresswell?" she asked and Harm nodded. "I think you need to explain things to me."

Taking her hand, Harm led her to the end of the bed and they both sat down.  
>"Well, about two months ago I went to see the General about your birthday," Harm said, lifting his hand to caress her face. "I wanted the week off for us both, as I told you, and I also wanted his permission to contact his wife about something we had discussed at Christmas."<br>"And what was that?" she questioned, still gazing at him.  
>"That, I can't tell you," he said kissing her nose. "As that is to do with your birthday present, but when I was talking to her about your present, I mentioned her husband not giving us the week and while she couldn't help with that due to the SecNav scheduling that meeting on Thursday, she came up with this idea and helped me put it together."<br>"But when?" Mac asked, the details not clear to her.  
>"Well, that night with Sturgis, was actually Dora and the night I was a no-show I was online trying to find the palm trees and pool...all that sort of thing...last week when you were in court, Dora and I met and finetuned a few things and then this morning as soon as the briefing was over, Cresswell dismissed me and I met Dora here at 0930 and the deliveries started at 1000 and it all came together really well."<br>"It's amazing," she said, "I ... I'm amazed ...to think you did it all for me..."  
>"I'm glad you like it," he said, leaning in and kissing her gently.<br>"I do, very much," she said, kissing him back. "Thank you."  
>"You're welcome, gorgeous," he said kissing her once more and this time the kiss led to them both being naked and entwined underneath the crisp white sheets of her bed.<p>

"So, when do I get my birthday present?" she asked as she rolled back onto her side of the bed, deliriously happy.  
>"Monday afternoon," he said, following her across and peppering her neck and shoulders with kisses.<br>"Why do I have to ...wait?" she said with a gasp as his tongue circled her nipple.  
>"Because your birthday's not til Monday," he replied as he worked his way down her body.<br>"But isn't this my birthday weekend?" she asked arching up into him.  
>"Yes," he said coming back up to her mouth. "But Monday afternoon it is and you'll have to wait," he said, pausing above her.<br>"Oh, all right," she conceded pulling him back to her; she could wait patiently, especially if she had something to occupy herself with.

The warmth of the apartment, the exertion of their activities saw them both asleep in the late afternoon, stirring after the sun had descended Mac realised she was hungry.  
>"Hungry..." she muttered, rolling into Harm. "Feed me..."<br>Harm grinned. "What would you like?" he asked, brushing her tangled locks from her face.  
>"Don't care," she replied, "Shame this place doesn't have room service."<br>"Who says it doesn't?" Harm asked, leaning backwards and pulling a binder from beneath the bed.

Opening it up on his chest, so she could see it, Harm explained the coloured dot code he'd used.  
>"These are the menus from every restaurant and fast food place which delivers here," he said, flicking through the pages. "The blue dot means they do breakfast, red is lunch, green is dinner and the black dots mean they deliver all night. So, ma'am, the choice is yours."<br>"How did you know we'd be in here when we were hungry?" she questioned, sitting up and pulling the sheet around her.  
>"Oh," he said, with a twinkle in his eye. "Just a hunch."<p>

In the end they went for a place which had a Japanese Spanish fusion menu and picked a range of tasty dishes which would be satisfying yet not too heavy. Leaving the bedroom to find his cell and making the call, Harm was surprised to see Mac walking from the bedroom, dressed in her bikini once more.  
>"I think we need to cool off in the pool before dinner," she said, heading to the kitchen.<br>"We could have done that naked," he said, looking down at his unclad form.  
>"Skinny dipping on our first day?" she said, raising an eyebrow. "Isn't that a bit adventurous?"<p>

Harm just laughed. He would have baulked at the idea of skinny dipping the first day on an actual island.  
>"Okay, give me a sec," he called as he headed back to find his trunks. After a quick search he was still sans trunks but turning he caught a strange reflection in Mac's mirror and turned to find his trunks dangling from the light fitting.<p>

Entering the kitchen, he found Mac had closed the blinds, left the lights off and lit the candles.  
>"You weren't planning on swimming laps, were you?" he asked as he watched her reclined against the side of the pool, the water lapping around her, her red painted toes making small splashes.<br>"Nope," she said opening her eyes. "More than happy just to chill right here."

Moving, she made room for Harm to slip in beside her before resting her head on his chest and draping her arm across him, her fingers playing in the water beside his hip.  
>"Love you," he whispered, kissing her head and Mac smiled.<br>"Love you too," she replied, looking up at him. "So very much."

Dinner, dancing, a moonlit encounter in the waterfalls, also known as Mac's shower, and the pair were back in bed succumbing to sleep, wrapped comfortably in each other's arms. Just as Harm drifted off Mac slapped his arm.  
>"What was that for?" he asked looking down to find her eyes still closed.<br>"Mosquito," she mumbled, nestling in closer.  
>Harm laughed; glad she was getting into the island spirit.<p>

Breakfast was of the buffet variety, thanks to Harm waking early and calling several different places to get the menu items he knew Mac would order if they were actually away. There were two serves of scrambled eggs, one of bacon, pancakes with maple syrup, tropical fruit salads, breads and pastries, a choice of apple or orange juice and two grande steaming cups of her favourite coffee.

Once the aroma of the coffee reached her, Mac padded out to the living room, her sarong now wrapped around her body.  
>"Morning, gorgeous," he said smiling at her mussed hair and still sleepy face.<br>"Morning to you too," she replied, making her way to him and kissing him.  
>"Ready for breakfast?" he asked, pulling a chair out at her dining table.<br>"Wow!" she said, realising there was more on offer than the coffee.  
>"Hungry?" he asked as she sat down.<br>"Always," she replied with a laugh as she waited for him to join her.  
>"Help yourself," he said, gesturing to the array of dishes in front of her.<br>"You're incredible," she said, reaching over and squeezing his hand.  
>"I know, you told me that last night too," he said, raising his eyebrows and grinning.<br>"Well, you were incredible then too...but this...I'm very impressed," she said nodding.  
>"Nothing but the best for you, Mac," he said kissing her hand.<p>

Breakfast was enjoyed with casual chatter before the topic turned to activities for the rest of the weekend.  
>"My plan was to camp out here all weekend and forget about the world out there for a bit," Harm said, before biting into his Danish. "But..." he said before swallowing. "I don't want you feeling confined ... if you want to go out ..."<br>"No," she said with a quick shake of her head. "I'd rather stay in with you," she said, not wanting to risk the outside world interfering with what they had going. "Just wondering what we were going to get up to."  
>"Well, after breakfast, I thought we could relax on the beach and grab some rays," he said gesturing to the lounges. "I could apply the sunscreen for you," he added with a wink.<br>"Sunscreen, hey?" Mac said, picking up her glass.  
>"Well, it's a jasmine and vanilla moisturising cream, figured it would work just as well," he said, using the napkin to wipe his mouth.<br>"Ooh, a massage, that sounds nice," she said smiling broadly. She loved massages from Harm, especially when she was totally relaxed and totally naked.  
>"And after that..." he started but Mac shook her head.<br>"Nope, no more, I'm happy with a massage ... a long, sensual, thorough massage," she said dreamily. "And later on I'll do the same for you."  
>"Deal!" Harm said, knowing all their massages ended up with the type of skin on skin contact that he enjoyed more than anything.<p>

Once the breakfast items were cleared away, Harm reclined the lounge to a flat position before throwing a pillow at the top of it. Spreading a towel out lengthwise, Harm smoothed it down before picking up the cream.  
>"Ready when you are," he called out to Mac who had gone to use the bathroom.<br>"You sure?" she sassed as she crossed the room dressed in nothing but a smile.  
>"Oh yeah," he replied. He was definitely ready for some uninterrupted time worshipping her body.<p>

When Mac was in position, Harm squeezed the cream into his hand and rubbed them together before kneeling beside the lounge and starting his mission. Starting with her neck and shoulders, Harm rubbed and massaged his way around and down her back before grabbing some more cream and working on her arms. By the time he had reached her legs she was fast asleep but Harm continued his work, gradually moving his way down to her feet.

Rather than wake her so she could turn over and he could work on the other side, he placed a towel over her, and went and washed his hands before picking up a book and settling on the lounge beside her. It was an hour before she woke.  
>"I fell asleep," she said with a yawn and stretch.<br>"Yes, you did," he replied, closing the book.  
>"You have very talented hands," she said turning over and sitting up.<br>"I'm glad you like them," he said smiling. "Now, if you're ready for me to work on your front ..."  
>"I am," she said, "Just not with your hands," she added, standing and stepping over to him.<p>

Removing the book from his hands and placing it on the floor, Mac helped him sit forward so she could lower his lounge. When this was down she eased him back and climbed onto him.  
>"My front wants this sort of massage," she said before kissing him thoroughly.<br>"Just the way I like it," he mumbled around her mouth.

Later that night, after they'd dined and bathed, Mac settled into his arms as they sat in her bed. Feeling sleepy but not tired, Mac realised what she was feeling was a state of relaxation, something she hadn't felt in a long time. She was relaxed, sated, fed, satisfied and very much in love and this was a completely new feeling for her.  
>"You've gone very quiet," Harm observed, kissing her head as her finger traced laps around his abdomen.<br>"Just thinking," she said with a sigh.  
>"About?" he prompted when she offered nothing more.<br>"Don't think I've ever felt this way before," she said and then explained her thoughts.  
>"That, my darling, Mac," he said, raising her head, not surprised to find her eyes filled with tears. "Is what it feels like to be happy."<br>"Happy," she echoed nodding her head, that would make sense.

There hadn't been a time since she hit puberty where she had been completely and utterly happy. It was no wonder she hadn't recognised the emotion.  
>"You okay?" he asked, when a tear trickled down her cheek.<br>"Yeah," she replied with a sniffle. "I'm happy."

Not wanting her to be overcome with emotion, Harm said nothing more but instead held her tighter with one hand and raked his fingers through her hair with the other one. Mac sighed deeply; there had been moments in her childhood when she was happy but since the day her mother walked out they had been few and far between. Sure there were happy moments since, the birth of each of her godchildren, being with Harm, her career, but none had given her this complete and overwhelming feeling of being happy.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Not mine

Journey 3/3

Sunday followed a similar pattern to Saturday, little to do but relax, order 'room service' and spend some quality time with each other; some of which was even clothed. Laying on bed that night, Mac was forcing herself to stay awake. Harm had been asleep ten minutes before Mac rolled onto him and kissed him thoroughly.  
>"It's 0000 hours, it's my birthday," she said before kissing him once more.<br>"Happy birthday," he replied before losing himself in her kiss.  
>"So, do I get my present now?" she asked, sitting cross legged beside him.<br>"No,' he said with a yawn. "I told you it was this afternoon."  
>"Not fair!" she said with a pout before a grin spread across her face. "I'm sure there's a way I could convince you to change your mind!"<br>"You can try," he said with a chuckle and then lay back as Mac did everything physically possible to get him to reconsider.

More than impressed with her techniques, and impressed with his body's ability to keep on responding so quickly to the urges she was creating, Harm was a willing participant. When finally both were exhausted, Mac rolled onto him once more.  
>"Now can I have it?" she asked, holding her weight on her forearms.<br>"Not until this afternoon," he said, wrapping his arms around her.  
>"But you said..." she started but Harm shook his head.<br>"I said you could try to convince me," he interjected.  
>"So, you're saying I was unconvincing in my argument?" she questioned.<br>"No, you were very convincing," he said pushing up and kissing her. "It just won't be delivered until we're home from our vacation."  
>"Huh?" she questioned.<br>"I'm going to take you out for a birthday lunch," he said, running his hand across her six. "And when we get back here, we'll be 'home' from our trip and your present will be in your apartment."  
>"So, it's in here now?" she asked for clarification.<br>"No, at the moment we are on a tropical island and your apartment is a million miles from here," he said before closing his eyes.  
>"You're going to make me wait, aren't you?" she said, rolling off him.<br>"I did tell you from the start it would be Monday afternoon because that's when it will be delivered, I couldn't get it here any earlier as we are away on vacation," he said opening one eye to gauge her reaction. "But it will be worth it."  
>"It better be," she muttered before turning her back to him and curling up under the sheet.<p>

Immediately, Harm rolled onto his side and wrapped his arm around her waist and that's how morning found them.

Waking late and knowing they were headed to an early lunch, Harm slid from bed and dressed before jogging down the block for pastries and Mac's favourite coffee. Returning just as she appeared from the bedroom, Harm held up the offerings.  
>"Thought we'd go for something light because we have a 1200 hour booking at Armando's," he said, placing the items on the dining table.<br>'Armando's?" she questioned, "Must be a special occasion..." she added with a grin.  
>"It is," he replied kissing her briefly. "Happy birthday, gorgeous."<br>"Thanks," she replied before kissing him back.

Dressed and ready to go by 1030, Harm was waiting on Mac. As she walked out of the bedroom dressed in a blue bra and panties set, Harm had to reconsider if they really needed to leave the apartment at all.  
>"Can't decide which one to wear," she said looking between the dresses she held in each hand. It was then Harm noticed the outfits.<p>

One was a blue dress which was better suited to evening and the other was a very pretty summer dress just perfect for a birthday lunch.  
>"That one," he said pointing to the one in her right hand before picking up the apartment keys.<br>"Isn't it too early to go?" she asked as he grabbed his cell.  
>"No," he replied. "Thought we could we could walk there, get some fresh air and another form of exercise."<br>"That would be nice," she said before hurrying off to dress.

A little more than twenty minutes later, Harm closed the apartment door behind them.  
>"It's been a nice little tropical island," he said, taking her hand as they headed down the stairs.<br>"Very," she said squeezing his hand.  
>"It will be nice to go home too," he continued knowing that by the time they returned there would be little evidence of their personal paradise.<br>"And then I will get my present," she said with a grin, she couldn't remember the last time she'd been this excited over a birthday present.  
>"And then you will get your present," he confirmed, knowing how excited she was about it and hoping she wouldn't be disappointed.<p>

Walking amiably, they chatted as they went and soon Harm's arm was looped over her shoulder, courtesy of Mac winding it around herself.  
>"I've had the best weekend," she said with a contented sigh, as they stood at an intersection waiting for the traffic lights to change.<br>"Me too," he said, kissing her head.  
>"I'll have to start thinking about what I'm going to do for your birthday," she said, stepping off the kerb when the walk signal came on.<br>"Plenty of time for that," he said, not wanting her to think of anything but herself for a bit longer.

Lunch was wonderful and both enjoyed pasta dishes with a huge Greek salad to share and hot and crispy garlic bread.  
>"Ohh," she groaned sitting back in her chair as the waitress cleared the dishes. "I really think we should take a few days off just to digest this food."<br>"It's great, isn't it?" he replied, using his thumb to remove a speck of sauce from the corner of her mouth.  
>"Beautiful," she said with a contented sigh. "You know," she continued. "I don't want this weekend to end. I know we have to go to work tomorrow and I'm grateful Cresswell gave us today but I don't want to think about you having to go back to your own place and things going back to the way they were before this weekend."<br>"They don't have to," he said, taking her hand. He wasn't looking forward to going home either. "Maybe we could talk about moving in together," he said then catching the look in her eyes, he decided just living together wouldn't do it. "Or maybe we should talk about something a little more permanent."  
>"Like?" she asked almost breathless.<br>"This," he said, producing a white ring box. "I bought this long before we ever had our first date," he admitted. "I saw it about six years ago when I was in the jeweller's getting my watched fixed and I knew it was perfect for you."  
>"Six years," she muttered.<br>"And I wasn't going to give it to you today," he said. "Because we've only been going out for three months ... but I've been carrying it with me because I knew I'd know the right moment...and I think this is it."

Sliding from his chair, Harm went down on one knee. "Sarah MacKenzie," he said, taking hold of her hand. "You are the love of my life. You are my life. I know I am never as happy or content as when you are by my side. With all that I am, all that I will ever be, I declare to you today that I am very much in love with you and ask that you consider allowing me the honour of being your husband for eternity."

Silently, he opened the box and took out the diamond encrusted gold band. When Mac failed to speak, he offered her the ring.  
>"Mac, will you marry me?" he asked as her tears trickled.<br>"I will," she said, offering him her hand and watched as he slid on the perfectly fitting ring. "Oh, Harm, I love you."

While she had never considered getting engaged to Harm after only three months of dating, the truth was from the moment they had their first date she knew there was only one outcome to this relationship. Hell, she knew it long before their first date. A long, loving kiss sealed the agreement and it was only the waiter bringing over complimentary desserts which brought them back to the restaurant.

Leaving the restaurant, Mac was floating on air and Harm wasn't all that far behind her. Deliriously happy, Harm knew that they couldn't return to Mac's apartment before 1430 and as it was they were going to be early.  
>"Before we get back can we stop here a minute," he said, gesturing to the nearby park.<br>"I'd rather get back and celebrate our engagement," she said, tugging his arm.  
>"Me too," he replied. "But humour me...just for a couple of minutes."<br>"Okay," she agreed, after all he had just given her an amazing weekend and a gorgeous engagement ring, time in the sunshine was the least she could do.

For ten minutes they sat on a bench under the shade of an old oak tree and watched the world hustle by. Little was said as they took the time to just reflect on their new status. When the time was right, Harm took her hand and stood.  
>"Ready?" he asked helping her stand.<br>"Ready," she confirmed and they ambled back to Mac's apartment.

Expecting the delights of the tropics to be beyond her door, Mac didn't know what to make of the fact that nearly everything was gone. Her apartment was back to being her apartment with the exception of the bedroom.  
>"What? How?" she questioned, shaking her head. "It's gone!"<p>

Then she had to wonder if it had all been a dream and she'd imagined the paradise. Looking down at her hand and seeing the ring, she knew it was all real.  
>"I did tell you that coming back this afternoon we'd be back home," he commented closing the door behind them.<br>"Yeah, I know but I thought it would be here and we'd have to pack it up," she said, turning around to face him.  
>"Nope," he said with a shake of his head. "All taken care of."<br>Mac looked around once more before nodding her head. "Okay," she said. "Can I get you some coffee?"  
>"I thought you'd be more interested in your birthday present," he said with a grin.<br>"Oh yeah, with this..." she said, holding up her hand with its new adornment, "And this..." she gestured to the apartment, "It slipped my mind."  
>"We can leave it..." he said.<br>"No!" she interjected emphatically, her excitement returning in abundance.  
>"Okay," he said with a chuckle. "Why don't you come and sit?" he said leading her to the sofa.<p>

Once she was settled, Harm drew a deep breath and sat on the sofa facing her.  
>"Now, your birthday present," he said, taking her hands in his. "Last year, when mom sent me that photo she'd found from when I was about three with her and dad, I remember you saying you felt sad you never had such a photo because after all, there were a few happy moments back then."<br>"You remembered that?" she questioned and Harm nodded, he remembered far more about her than he'd admit.  
>"Then when we were at Bud and Harriet's for AJ's birthday, I caught you looking at their most recent family snap and you had the same wistful look in your eyes," he said, keeping his eyes locked on hers. "Then I remembered a conversation I had with Dora at Christmas and she was telling me of her paintings and how she'd done a couple of family portraits. When you were away two months ago I let myself in and took some photographs...I returned them before you got back," he added quickly, "Then I met with Dora to discuss what I wanted ... what I thought you wanted and her artwork is your birthday present from me."<br>"Can I see it?" she whispered, her emotions taking her voice. She had wanted to have a family picture for so long.

Standing, Harm moved to the far wall and picked up the 24 x 12 inch canvas which had been stashed behind the table. Carrying it back, Harm carefully turned it around and asked her to close her eyes. When she did, he resumed his place on the table, holding it so she would see it the moment her eyes were opened.  
>"Open," he whispered and Mac's eyes sprung opened, followed by her tears which sprung forth.<p>

There she was looking at her first ever family portrait. While the images had been taken from three different photos, Dora had positioned them so perfectly that no one would ever tell they hadn't sat for the portrait. Mac was about five, her long brown hair was up in messy pigtails, her fringe was uneven and a bottom tooth was missing. The original photo had been taken at a fourth of July picnic.

Her mother would have been in her late twenties, and she weighed about 140 pounds. It had been taken at a neighbour's wedding and Mac could still remember the dress she was wearing. It was the same dress which Mac had hidden in her closet the day her mother walked out, hoping she'd come back to collect her special dress.

Her father wouldn't have been much older than her mother and while he was drinking, it was still under control. He had played for the camera one Christmas when Mac was about four and Dora had used this to capture his cheeky side.

For five minutes, Mac just stared at the painting and cried and Harm gave her the minutes to herself but when he could no longer stand his own tears, or hers, he rested the painting on the floor, leaning it against the coffee table, and sat beside her on the sofa wrapping her in his arms and kissing her head.  
>"I hope these tears are happy ones," he whispered as she ducked her head under his chin and cried into his shirt.<br>"Yeah, they are," she managed, looping her arm around him. "It's amazing ... it's beautiful... it's what I've always wanted."  
>"I thought as much," he said, kissing her head.<br>"Thank you," she said kissing him. "You have no idea what this means to me."  
>"I think I do," he said using the pad of his thumb to wipe away her tears. "It's about remembering that although there were hard times, you were a family once, happy once, and you want to keep hold of that," he said, speaking from experience.<br>"That's exactly right," she said, wiping his tears. "That's exactly right."

For a long while they sat curled up with each other, looking at the picture, taking in every brushstroke, every splash of colour.  
>"What are you thinking?" he asked after neither had spoken for ten minutes.<br>"I'm thinking of the irony of finally getting a memento of one family on the day I get another," she said, looking at her engagement ring.  
>"It's been a long journey getting from one to the other, hasn't it?" he said, kissing her hand.<br>"It has," she said, looking up at him. "So very long and there were so many times when I thought I would never make it...never get what I was desperate for..."  
>"And now?" he questioned, raising her face with the crook of his finger.<br>"Now, I have the only family I will ever need, the family I will have until the day I die and I am very happy and very grateful and just so... relieved," she said, slumping into him.

While the future would be bright and full of everything her heart desired, right now she was exhausted from the journey it had taken to get there and needed a little time to recover before taking the next step into what would be an amazing future for them both.


End file.
